Reflections on Becoming VEGAN

As a human being I have the gift of free will to make conscious choices. Naturally in consort with this endowment, comes self responsibility for the outcomes my decisions create, whether they be conscious or not. It is not for me to judge another for their preferences. I can be an example, but it would be unloving for me to interfere with your own gift of free will. 

As I glance back over half a century of options, there are many ways in which I now see they could have been more loving and truthful. I was simply learning to survive with the restrictive parameters of childhood and an environment that taught me many culturally accepted untruths. I learnt to nurture our furry felines, but stamp on scurrying, scary spiders. My chatty little guinea pigs were pets in England, but the’d be Sunday lunch for kids in Peru. The flock of frisky sheep in my back yard could be gently fed from my hand and yet it was another that ripped apart those innocent lambs to feed the lions share of my family. 

To my Hindu friends I shamefully admit, yes, I have killed a sacred cow to satisfy my addictive desire for raw, red flesh, even vying with my cat, for slithers of left-over steak. When a baby calf was waiting to suckle at her mother’s bosom, she was wrenched away from this highly nutritious milk, that I may gulp down a creamy pint of the best. Taught it was a necessity for my developing bones, I now look back and wonder if an abundance of my own mother’s milk would have done the trick. In those early years, eggs were a must. Boiled, poached, scrambled and fried or subtlety disguised in deliciously sweet cookies, cakes and custards. My young eyes and heart were not open to a hen’s wretched cackling plight or to the cute male chicks obsolete life, who pecked their way into a new world order, only to be suffocated or ground alive into pet food for we, ‘the animal lovers’! Although I grew up near a farm, I was never truly sensitive to the hidden exploits of billions of enslaved animals screeching and yelping their suffering and brutal slaughter. Instead I stayed unconscious to the transparency of truth through the collective teachings of my desensitized environment and the blinkered perception of neatly packaged supermarket proteins. This was an inherited existence I chose to continue, despite my erroneous belief that I adored animals, well at least the perceived cuddly kind. 

From my early teens I learnt to love the alchemy and creativity of cooking, proud to present a piquant of seasonings and spices with a rainbow of colors and textures to delight the most experienced of palettes. In reality, much of what I prepared and savored was either from, a part of, or a whole sentient being. Bright and beautiful creatures, great and small. There were my favorite blue cheeses and the white creamy chocolates I craved. Mouthwatering filet mignon was a treat and crispy strips of fatty bacon a frequent enticement. A rabbit, a fish, a chicken and snails, all ripped from their freedom and a potential to thrive, forced into submission by an executioners knife, to indulge this ill advised, unconscious child with a plethora of protein too plentiful to absorb.

It was in my twenties that I experimented with being vegetarian, although there were still times when I lapsed and realized my intellectual wish was overruled by the true underlying desires of my heart and taste buds for burnt flesh, mercurial sea creatures and hormonal laden dairy pleasures. Intellectually, being vegetarian allured a false sense of empowerment, to be trendy and haughtily ‘right’, but I know now that even after 30 years of a meatless diet, my soul hadn’t transformed. There were the years I worked in the Soviet Union when being vegetarian was not understood and unattainable. With vegetables a rarity, if I wanted to stay strong and healthy, I’d need to transgress, so months of intermittent diet ensued and my digestion showed uncomfortable confusion! More recently I was dangerously sick and painfully skinny, so when I finally got to breaking point with illness, I made the choice to heal and for a year I ignorantly thought eating anything and everything to support my body’s capacity to not only survive, but thrive, was par for the course. I was oblivious that my unloving choices were decreasing the condition of my soul, which would eventually show itself in my physical body, whether in further dis-ease or emotional turmoil. 

At last I awoke from that slumbered error and although my body was beginning to become fluidly robust again, a deeper emotional level within me, knew that if I wanted to authentically and automatically make more loving choices and become even healthier than before, I had to develop the humility and desire to feel absolutely everything; the good, the bad and the ugly….. without judgement, blame or condescension. I needed to look at the emotional causes to my sometimes compulsive decisions, often taken out of fear rather than love and truth. 

I’d been a healer and soul coach for many years and as the proverb goes, ‘healer, heal  thyself’. Some months before I became debilitated, I’d started to be aware of a simpler, speedier and yet very challenging focus for healing my soul, ie. on a permanent basis. This meant developing a more loving condition in my soul through an emotional experience, addressing the cause, rather than the symptoms of my bodies (physical and spiritual). Before I had time to develop this new perception, pain and weakness overtook me and I dropped down into an abyss of darkness, but a spark of this inspiring inner knowledge stayed alive within the recesses of my hopeful heart. 

My stroke of luck, literally a stroke, was like a bolt of lightening, blasting open some of the resistive emotions that now poured through the flood gates and created a new found clarity of the immense journey I was to about embark upon and becoming vegan was only one grain of sand in the great Sahara. I was ready! One purposeful step at a time, trusting the sign posts will help to me know if each choice is sincerely based in Love and Truth or in fear and addiction. Through everything I attract and the barometer of my body, I will  know which direction to take and although I may stray, as soon as I make that shift in my soul, on each facet of myself, I will be changed.

First I had a glimmer of desire, born out of a definite wish to improve my soul’s condition. This was my main reason. The bonus is it’s a powerfully preventative way to stay healthy, help the environment and reduce the suffering of animals. I read articles and watched movies about the food industry and it’s broad brushstrokes (there’s a plethora of information on the internet). Everything from the false beliefs I was taught as a child, to the use of antibiotics and hormones on animals, then consumed by us. From the impact on global warming and pollution through deforestation and animal by-products, to the desensitization of human souls who work in factory farming and slaughterhouses. The list goes on and I could go into so many details, but suffice to say, once I started reading, watching and listening to gruesome realities, I sobbed for weeks. Through the depths of lamenting has come some repentance for my personal responsibility in my past actions and a change in me that has released a desire for animal products, replaced by a hearty passion for a raw plant-based diet and plant alternatives.

Many have said it’s so dull and unhealthy to be vegan, but when you experiment with combination, eat fresh, local products, use lots of spices and herbs, balance each meal, it’s delicious and you feel so much more alive and nourished. I went from 24 hour pain, hardly able to take a step or speak coherently, to walking 500 miles of the Camino de Santiago (Spain) I’m healthier, fitter, happier and have less conscious burden from past choices. I didn’t suddenly change, I educated myself into the best combination of foods for my location. Here in Mexico it’s not easy to buy the specialty vegan products available elsewhere, but there’s a vast variety of legumes, tropical fruits, organic veggies, chia, amaranth and so much more. 

People insincerely question and quiz me about becoming vegan, which I’m sure is masked in defence of their own choices and judgements. It’s not for me to tell them what to do, but if they genuinely want to know, I’m happy to share. When I became vegan I noticed how I was no longer asked to dinner parties, but what I seem to lose in one area, I’ll gain in another. Often others seem to find it more difficult that I’m vegan than I do. 

There are many untrue vegan myths banded about from: you wont have enough protein or calcium, vegan diets make you weak, it’s boring and too difficult, children can’t be vegan, animals won’t survive on plants alone. All untrue!  Educate, experiment and experience for yourself. It’s a huge subject so if you have a hint of a desire to know more there are plenty of resources. Of course it is possible to make unhealthy choices and be vegan. eg. a diet of potatoes chips and sweetened drinks, no fruit and veggies, etc. 

By the way, in case you’re wondering, yes, there are plenty of vegans in the world: the most powerful animals are herbivores (elephants, gorillas), the strongest man in Germany ‘Popeye’ is vegan, as is ultra marathon runner, Scott Jurek.  Brad Pitt, Ellen Degeneres, Alanis Morisette, Will.I.Am, Madonna, the Williams tennis sisters and many more. 

For everyone there motivation may be different, but or me, becoming vegan was a soul based, emotional option and process. Once I’d moved through all the fears, educated myself, recognized the detrimental effects my choices had made, gone through a deeply emotional release and felt repentant, I no longer had a desire for animal products. Changing to a plant based diet became easy and automatic. A choice I know will never change.

We humans are the most complex of creations, giving us dominion over all earthly elements. Some would therefore see us as superior beings, who have the right to wield power over another life form, rather than be responsible for living in loving harmony with everything. As I explore my local environment or travel across the globe, it’s obvious the majority of us humans, throughout much of our existence, have chosen the arrogant power game of dominance, with each other and with everything in our environment. We have the ability to develop a more compassionate and caring humanity but first there are eons of erroneous foundations to disassemble, before a stable, sustainable structure can be recreated. Of course, as we dismantle the old, we could be overwhelmed with chaos, whether internal or external and our false fears will want us to avoid anything deemed too extreme by society. This can apply to becoming vegan or to practically any area of our life. Change begins with each of us being that change….. 

Discover more truth about our abuse of God’s Creations, the damage it does to them, to ourselves, to our environment. Consider the long term effects on your heart and soul in your choices, rather than the temporary existence of your physical body.

A few inspirations: 

Netflix Documentaries: Gamechangers, What the Health, Rotten and Cowspiracy

PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) Free Vegan Starter Kit
(https://www.peta.org/living/food/free-vegan-starter-kit/)

The Vegan Society: (https://www.vegansociety.com) 

Veganuary: (https://veganuary.com/)

With Hugs of Love, 

Alicia Mary x 

Are you a Spiritual Warrior?

It was over 20 years ago, in a drama class, we were asked to choose and memorise a short essay. We would repeat it over and over again with differing scenes, voices and emphasis. My journey through life had always felt like a spiritual quest and though I found many inspiring pieces of writing nothing resonated enough for me to authentically pour forth my heart and soul in such repetitive diversity.  Finally I wrote this small piece in the vein, that I too was a ‘Spiritual Warrior’ with a mission. Perhaps it will feel relevant to a part of your own journey….

"The Spiritual Warrior fighting against a tide of fear from outside and within. We are so many and yet we feel we are alone in this world. Seek and you shall find your own kind. Speak of your own inner truth, of who you really are and wish to be and you shall attract reflections of yourself. The courage will come as you live your truth and follow those whispers from the Universe. 

Can you remember that joyful child you were, playing with abandon and glee?  Imagine feeling that secure freedom once again and bring it into your life now. Recapture your childlike sense of wonder and awe and view this world as a magical place!

With this knowing, this enthusiasm, this revitalised you, go out there and make a difference! We are so often silent, afraid of upsetting the status quo, of not being loved for who we really are. Now is a time to come together, to quieten our ego and create unity within ourselves, our soul family, the world. 

The winter months take us into the warmth of our own caves; into the darkness, where only a candle lights our way; into our dreams where visions are formed. Soon spring shall be upon us and we’ll clean and clear a new space for power to live and grow as Spiritual Warriors.”

The evolving years and transformative experiences of life, would have me add more and change the perspective, but the simple concepts are still significant. The overall feelings that: it’s truly possible to be loved unconditionally, the view from outside the box has wonderful advantages, cultivating our childlike curiosity is beneficial, humility is a key to creating harmony within ourselves and therefore the world and that time alone is vital component for developing a more loving condition in our heart and soul. 

How do you begin your day?

We often create unconscious morning rituals to help us feel grounded, motivated and encouraged, especially on days that seem too busy, turbulent or uncertain. This blog is an updated version of one I wrote while living and recovering in rural Mexico. 

Heading down a windy footpath, to the opulent river valley below, the vegetation changed to lush greens and browns, pungent humidity pervading the air. I sat pensively on a well worn rock, my feet dangling in the silky waters, the dogs lapping up a welcome drink and frolicking in the shallows. Sturdy trees surrounded me, summoning a metaphoric image of self: foundational roots reaching down into the depths of the Earth, branches stretching high to the sky and a trunk steady and stable, yet also adept at swaying if strong winds blew. 

How do you begin your day? 

We physically open our eyes, but are we really awake or just following a compulsive addictive habit? Do we notice the subtle ‘messages’ within ourselves, with others and our environment? Do we stop for a moment to take a deep breath or do we feel too snowed under by the weight of our schedule?

What’s the foundational beginning of your day? Are you constantly in a busy mode with people and a long list of To-Do’s or have you created some time and space to simply contemplate, observe and inwardly empower the inception of your day? 

Perhaps ponder your own morning routine, while I share an insight into mine.

Although my morning routine has altered over the years, the general premise has stayed the same: a cleansing ritual from bathing to water intake; listening and writing messages from inner spiritual guidance; walking in the connectedness of nature and creating time for my soul’s emotional intelligence to ebb and flow. This is the foundation that inspires the dawning of my day - obviously dependant upon commitments, ratios of time vary greatly.  

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Every morning as I drifted back into a resting body, I’d gently endeavour to be aware of the often profound communiqué’s from my dream state. As I began to stir from slumber, I’d hear the tell-tale sign of aroused dogs with expectant tails wagging enthusiastically, before they unceremoniously leapt upon me. Certainly one sure way to awaken! Their anticipated excitement for our morning hike was palpable. I was frequently in the sanctuary of solitude, but had the gift of these friendly house dogs, inspiring my daily journaling and rejuvenating rambles.

My feet intrepidly touched the cold stone floor, emboldening my first brisk barefoot walk of the day…..  all the way to the kitchen, to gulp back copious cups of water and make a cleansing hot lemon drink. As the water boiled, I would be inspired to emulate the yogic stretches, elegantly performed by the pride of sleepy cats, provoked to awaken by the dogs yawning yelps. From disabling infirmity, my fragile body was in the infancy of recovery, but as I observed the cats and dogs instinctual nature, I sensed these simple feline asanas and routine morning dog rambles, would help me heal and restore my physical form. Along the way, I could also choose to grow and change on multiple levels of awaked-ness. I felt an unfurling excitement of perceptible possibility stir within the very core of my being.

Despite the dogs eager excitement to explore beyond the garden limits, I nestled back into bed, my calmness reflected in those that snuggled beside me. Almost in time with their own gentle snores, I delved into diaphragmatic breaths, diving deeper into unknown pathways within. It was time for my ritual morning pages. As my pen took me to another world, so too the dogs drifted into a dreamy slumber. The fluidity of written revelation soon poured out, automatically stimulating me to recognise more latent truths and feelings, often veiled through habits and addictive pursuits. These evolving awarenesses often simultaneously delivered both pain and joy, bringing relief in the release of repressed emotions, concurrently bearing the fruit of new insights. It was always a Journey to inspire the beginning of my day.

Without disturbing the dogs stillness, I readied myself quietly, but as soon as I grabbed my hiking boots they all suddenly leapt into a tangible buzz of hopeful adventure, a contagious delight to stimulate the quietest of souls.

It seems to some I spend a chunk of time on daily dog walks, but for me the dogs have become secondary to the main multi-faceted purpose of this morning ritual. Dogs were never really a part of my life until I inadvertently found myself living in the spectacular mountains of central Mexico. At that point, I was at the beginning of salvaging myself from chronic illness and a stroke. A long story, to be told another day…. 

A dear friend kindly invited me to rehabilitate myself at her tranquil pastoral setting, with an array of animals, including the affectionate house dogs. They soon became an influential component on my road to recovery. Our dog friends don’t need a lot to be healthy, happy and content: good food and water, exercise and lots of sleep, playtime and affection. Some of the basic elements that we instinctually follow for ourselves but often also neglect. 

Truth be told, the dogs took me for a walk. In those early days in Mexico, they motivated me to move and in spite of fatigue and frequent falls, the repetitive reconnection of neurons, nerves and muscles expedited my body’s regeneration. Walks became multi-tasking expeditions of inner and outer exploration. Each day I’d begin with a few deep breaths to feel present and connected with my environment and more astute to my body’s barometric variations. A sense of calm or anxiety, an attitude of gratitude or lack of appreciation, a subtle pain and new ache, a disconnect from brain to limb or a lightness and ease of movement. I observed the numerous shifts and changes without judgement but as a way of monitoring my process and expectant progress.  

Walking gave me the time and space to flow with nature and delve deeper into the root causes of any lingering or obscure dis-ease within me. With every breath and each step, I allowed underlying emotions to rise, often as overwhelming waves of anguish and sadness, but I endeavoured to accept everything without a need to analyse and label. The more deeply I breathed, stayed present and gently moved, the more would rise and sometimes with a great surge….. release, often bubbling over into spontaneous giggles of gratitude, a greater inner clarity and the calmness that often follows a storm.

The dogs were a mirror for some concealed facets of myself. Watching and interacting with their instinctual nature was an avenue to observe intrinsic aspects of joy, as well as unhealed wounds within my heart and soul. Their ever curious noses led them forth, ears alert to each subtle sound, encouraging me to arouse the potentiality of my own senses, guiding me on life’s journey. It’s a common fact that we humans only use a small percentage of our brain’s capability. Imagine if we chose to develop greater use of all our senses, including our innate ‘sixth sense’ or ‘gut feeling’. 

Although I always walked alone with the dogs, I felt an open and kind connection to the sparse family homes I encountered along the way. I trod gingerly on the rugged country pathways, mindful of my equilibrium’s deficiency and dulled ability to react. I passed pastoral scenes of farmers coercing bulls to rhythmically plough their corn fields, stirring rich smells of fertile earth. Row upon row of strawberries sweetened the air, as families harvested ripe pickings for market. Baby goats bleated in unison, searching for their mothers warm, nurturing milk. The local neighbourhood, waving, watching and cheerfully nodding their welcoming smiles, tirelessly working to scratch out a living. Wherever I’ve traveled in the world, I notice simple communities often show a generosity of humanity and cordiality, often not found in so called ‘civilised’ societies. Note to self: keep things simple! 

Leaving the beautiful connection with community behind, I felt an even greater flow of connectedness, as I became immersed in the bounty of nature’s medicinal purity. I set forth through meadows of abundant wild flowers, a rainbow of diverse blossoms, fragrant with rarified scents. Flowers have always fascinated me as a reflector of Universal perfection, of what we physically observe in nature and beyond, to what is yet to be discovered. 

I returned home filled with inspiration, trusting it would naturally continue to flow, after I’d eaten a hearty breakfast of fresh fruit and homemade muesli. Blessedly, the dogs ate and quietly slept for hours, giving me the gift of a peaceful, productive and graceful day, pursuing many of the inspirations and insights I’d received early that morning.

The fluidity of water’s cleansing ability, the emotional intelligence flowing from my heart and soul, my relationships, to our Creator, personal spirit guides and the environment (people, animals and nature), are an all encompassing influence on the way I begin each new day.  

In observing the natural world, I see such an immaculate structure, within which is a permanent scope of fluidity, allowing for the nuances and dramatic transformations, possible through our conscious choices. As I witness this precision whether in a single leaf, my physical body or in the faultless placement of Earth within our Solar System, I know that when I create a loving structure for myself, Universal Laws support me, as I also acquiesce to the flow of it’s loving character to correct me when my choices are askew! 

So, how will you choose to begin your day?